var stupid_message = new Array();
var numMsg = 14;
stupid_message[0] = "The pledge of allegiance does not end with \"Hail Satan!\"";
stupid_message[1] = "I don't live in fantasy; I only work there.";
stupid_message[2] = "There was no Roman God named \"Fartacus\".";
stupid_message[3] = "These pages are the official opinion of the voices in my head.";
stupid_message[4] = "Just keep telling yourself, \"I am NOT part of the food chain!\"";
stupid_message[5] = "Goldfish don't bounce.";
stupid_message[6] = "May your offspring feast on the hearts of their enemies.";
stupid_message[7] = "Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.";
stupid_message[8] = "Five days is too long to wait for a gun!";
stupid_message[9] = "This Space For Rent.";
stupid_message[10] = "I won't be thanking anyone, thank you.";
stupid_message[11] = "I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr.";
stupid_message[12] = "Do not watch this space!";
stupid_message[13] = "I have two personalities. One is paranoid, the other is out to get him.";
stupid_message[14] = "Kiss me twice, I'm schizophrenic.";

var description = new Array();
var tmpIndex;
var tmpIndex = Math.round(Math.random()*numMsg);
description[0] = stupid_message[tmpIndex];
description[1] = "Home - Where I go to get away from you people.";
description[2] = "History - An abridged listing of Kastners through history.";
description[3] = "Stuff - Various and sundry pages on this site.";
description[4] = "Links - Go someplace else.";
//description[5] = "Contact - Email The Kastner.";

function debug()
{ window.alert(tmpIndex); }

function updateMessage(desc) {
	document.getElementById("Words").innerHTML = description[desc];
}

function ucountr () { document.write(Math.round(Math.random()*100000)); }

function fromwhere() {
document.write('<b>' + document.referrer + '</b>');
}

function kemail(who, fname, doma, domb, subj){ 
    if (subj) {
    document.write('<a href="javascript:kmailme(\''+who+'\', \''+fname+'\', \''+doma+'\', \''+domb+'\', \''+subj+'\')">'+who+'@'+domb+'.'+doma+'</a>');
    }
    else {
    document.writeln('<a href="javascript:kmailme(\''+who+'\', \''+fname+'\', \''+doma+'\', \''+domb+'\')">'+who+'@'+domb+'.'+doma+'</a>');
    }
}

function kmailme(who, fname, doma, domb, subj) {
var mail;
    mail='mailto:'+fname+' <'+who+'@'+domb+'.'+doma+'>'; 
    if (subj) { mail=mail+'?subject='+subj; }
    window.location=mail;
}